Steve Andreas > Articles > Escaping the “Black Hole” of Judgement

An Example of Preference

Now think again of the same person, act, or event that you just used as an example of judging, “X is wrong!” Now I want you to express the same valuing as a very strong preference, “I really prefer Y over X!”

Next compare your experience of judgement and preference. By thinking of the same content alternately as a judgement or a preference it is much easier to discern subtle differences between the two. Making the strength or intensity of the two as similar as possible, take some time to compare these two experiences of the same content to find out how your experience differs. Switch back and forth between them to discover what differences you find in wha you see, hear, and feel—and make a few notes. Please pause and take a few minutes now to actually do this, so that you can discover what your experience is. Then read on to compare what you experienced with what others have found...

One of the most obvious differences is that in preference, there are always two (or more) representations—what we like more, as well as what we like less, while in judgement we are usually only aware of what we condemn. This creates an analog distinction of “more/less than,” that can vary over a range, instead of digital either/or opposites (good or bad). Below is a sampling of the kind of differences that others have reported. Your experience may be somewhat different, but probably most of these will be at least parallel to your experience

If you look at the list above, preference has many more distinctions and options, making it a much richer and more resourceful experience. It is much more likely to be a good basis for problem-solving in the real world when you have a difference of opinion with someone else. Let’s examine this in more detail, starting within a wider frame of how we perceive and process information.